Wednesday, October 7, 2009

my little accessory....

so i was thinking the other day....that mother nature plays a dirty little trick on its moms out there....or maybe it was just me....or maybe i played the trick on myself....anyway....

when billy and i were contemplating beginning the process of becoming a family larger than two....i would see little babies and want one....not one to feed...or to change or wake up with in the night....no i just wanted one....like you want an ipod....or a new purse....i wanted a little accessory that would laugh and smile and i could dress up in the cutest little outfits and take for a walk in a cute little stroller....ya materialistic...i know....but that's how i saw it....and i honestly thought nothing of it....

then after a little while we started to say to ourselves "are we ready for that?" ...for those sleepless nights and crying little sounds, for the sudden lack of freedom that will occur....and we would say, "we can do it!"... it will be hard but we can do it....

so you might be confused at this point in time because i just went from talking about my soon to be newborn as an accessory and then to admitting that i thought about the hard parts right!? ya, here is mother nature's little trick....she prepares you slowly at first....i wanted an accessory....then i wanted a baby....i didn't look past the accessory part until we were trying....then i wanted a baby....and now here i am almost 6 months along and it has just barely dawned on me that what we asked for was not an accessory....not just a baby....but a lifetime....our lifetimes....and here we are with this little one on the way and i am just barely realizing that i have to raise this little accessory of mine!!! not just in its baby stages but all the way through....i'll have to discipline and fight with and set ground rules and worry about this little thing i thought i could just snuggle and hold for all eternity....on the first day i realized this i had a slight panic attack....i went to billy and i told him...."i thought i ordered an accessory!!!" and he just proceeded to laugh....

now i have come to the conclusion that yes...i will have to raise my accessory....yes, i will have to argue and discipline and cry with my accessory....but i am going to take this one day at a time....and enjoy my little accessory as much as i possibly can....because well, it's going to have to last me a lifetime and beyond....

and so maybe i am the only one in the whole world who felt this way....and maybe this sounds absolutely horrible to some of you....but that is how mother nature played her little trick on me....only now i have realized it wasn't really a trick....it's really a blessing that i wouldn't have had the courage to ask for if i had seen it any other way....

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

fall weather....

besides the freak hail storm on sunday morning...i must say i didn't mind too much our weather this weekend. bb and i went for a drive up the alpine loop on saturday while listening to conference and this is some of what we saw....
i am a little sad by the fact that it is so cold that the leaves are changing much quicker than normal :( but i am glad we took the opportunity to go see them!
photos by billy bush

Monday, October 5, 2009

we may have a soccer player on our hands....

last weekend...i was enjoying a plate of toast...the plate was plastic, resting on my baby bump and i was on my last piece when the plate jumped into the air...i guess the little one didn't like it there....he doesn't really like anything resting there....including mom's arms....it's getting tough to fold them anymore....

Friday, October 2, 2009

tid bit....

i read this quote the other day and i am pretty sure it has/is going to have, a profound impact on my life.... just a thought...

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