Wednesday, October 12, 2011

no excuses...

i messed up...i missed my defense, we are visiting with family and i spaced it. but no excuses i am getting back on the ball. so, with my lack of posting yesterday, i thought i would really put some effort into today, here it goes.

my little man has had croup for the past few days, the dr. put him on steroids to help open his airways, and i hate the sound of those coughs every morning and the inevitable feeling of helplessness when the humidifier and outside air just aren't getting the job done. so with that, we have kind of been taking it easy and with the sudden drop in temperatures we have been limiting our outdoor festivities to quick car trips and maybe lunch out, with the occasional walk out to the backyard apple trees. but he likes it outside. and stands at the back door waiting for us to let him explore, and well stalking the cat. and i hate thinking that he feels left out...

so on this october 12th, as i sit and think about down syndrome awareness, the back of my little guys head has me tied up in knots wondering how often i will see this picture throughout the often i will wonder how he is feeling when he begins to notice that his peers can do things a little easier than he can or even perhaps things he can not do at all. and it hurts to think about....because no mother ever wants to think about the loneliness her child might feel, that feeling of being left out.

and i know it will come, inevitably, here and there...but i also know that he will have glorious moments of kinship...that he will make friends, that he will have companionship, and that he will be able to do things right along side his peers too. and i realize that every kid has that feeling of loneliness at one time or another, i still get that feeling...and that it isn't out of the norm for him to feel that way, in fact it is more normal than anything. because some kids are beautiful artists, some are fantastic dancers and some breeze through school, but no kid does everything with the same ease as their peers...and camden is no exception to that rule, and it's ok, because he will have success and he will have happiness in his very own ways. and i am thankful to be his momma, to watch him blossom, to see the excitement in his eyes, to feel his tiny arms around my neck, to know that he loves and is loved and that those things won't ever change.

and if it's not too much to ask, try a little harder this month to include someone who might be feeling a bit left out, because we all have known that feeling at one time or another, and we will probably all feel it again.


  1. This is something I think about a lot too because Sutter already watches Landon getting to do things he can't or isn't big enough for. He knows he's being left out and it makes him so frustrated and me so sad! We try really hard to do "big" boy things when Sutter is sleeping and if not then we do our best to include him but it's hard and it will be for a long time to come!

    Hope Cam feels better soon and can get back outside to explore!

  2. I might be a little jealous that you guys are in Idaho and I'm not there to sneak over and play with your cute kid!
    I guess the only thing I can share is the experiences I've learned through working with the kids in my special needs institute. I can't ever say that I understand exactly what you're going through or pretend like I have some super great advice but all I know is that the kids in my class especially my friend with down syndrome Joey, teach me everyday how to have extreme amounts of faith and how to be a better human being. I can't imagine the courage it takes to send your child out everyday and hope that strangers understand and accept them but there are those of us out there who love them and understand them and can't imagine our lives without them being exactly the way they are.

  3. You some how always make me tear up. Let me know when he is feeling better and you get back so we can come say hello =]


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